We Did This To Ourselves

by Call Me Malcolm

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    11 track CD Album in glossy cardboard sleeve

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released July 26, 2014

Derryck T. Hughes - Vox/Bone
Lucias - Vox/Guitar
Trev - Bass
Baxter - Beats

Artwork by Dan Johnson.

Recorded at Outhouse Studios and produced by Meesta Grimalkin, Derryck T. Hughes and Lucias Malcolm. Mastered by Dave Lear.



all rights reserved


Besharp Records London, UK


During May and June, all records are free to download.
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Mike was a huge part of the BeSharp family, playing in and recording many bands that we have worked with.

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Track Name: You're Free (To Do As We Tell You)
You’re Free (To Do As We Tell You)

This place is closed and the window’s bricked
They pulled the trigger till the gun went click
The sign says no entry and the doorway’s blocked
By the stamped out dreams of the waning flock
The streets are cracked red from the mutilation
Of the faint hope of the population
That they’d grow tired of your apathy
But looks who’s dry of sympathy

Step back, hop up, you're free to do as we tell you
Skank on, and on

Pick up your feet, set this place alight
Come up and see the town burn tonight
This is primetime, double header
We play the ska too and it makes us feel better (than you)

So time ticks by metronomically
As the powers be fry comically
In the fat of their mistold fabrication
And the weight of our modest expectation
So here we go, make your self heard to us
Skank and scream till your ego burst
This is the two minute forty seven
And the closest we’ll ever get to…
Track Name: I Sold My Cat
I Sold My Cat

And all of my reminiscing,
Won’t cover up what I had,
Won’t fill the gaps that I’m missing,
Stitch it all up like I’m glad.

I get the feeling that you’re not so tough,
Now you’re western bound and it could be rough,
Now you’re on your own and it’s not enough
But I’m stronger than that.

The distance is first and it kills me,
The silence is worse when I’m here
The absence of you in the city,
When the memory of you is still here.

Suddenly I don’t feel so bad, for all my reminiscing
Suddenly I don’t feel so mad, that all of my stuff is missing
Suddenly I don’t feel so sad, my cat is moving on
Goodbye memories to empty bladders on.

And all of my reminiscing,
Won’t cover up what I had,
Won’t fill the gaps that I’m missing,
And this is the part where I’m sad.
Track Name: I'm Alright, I Suppose
I’m Alright, I Suppose

Is why I work all day,
Working 9 till 5 is dull but I get regular pay.
I’m neither rich nor poor,
Seriously, don’t worry about me, I’ll be ok I’m sure cause…

Every night I get 7 hours sleep,
It’s just enough for me to feel.

I tend to ignore chances right in front of me,
It tends to satisfy my general apathy,
I’m ok with what I’ve done and how it went,
So raise your hands and shout out for the ‘quite content’.

Is where I’m comfortable,
When I hang around in the underground it feels unnatural.
Is where I strive to be,
Just take this song, it won’t get a gong, but it’ll end up on track 3, so…

Sing along, sing along if you’re ok,
It’s just enough for me to play.

Every night I go to bed at 11pm,
But if I’m tired then I’ll make it 10.
Track Name: Headshot

Staggering, feeling sick I know,
All of the things, that I wanted to say,
Stuttering, feeling staccato,
hinders my progress in this way.

I know that I should head home,
Cause the party has died but I’m drinking instead,
I feel sick but what I should know,
Is that I’ll piss in the sick and then puke in my bed.

Cause I’m hanging, and I can’t get out of my bed,
Yes, I’m hanging.

I make a break, in the general direction,
Of the door, or thereabouts,
I feel weak, and I can’t
remember the way out.

The next thing I remember I’m home,
There’s a girl hopelessly, trying to undress me
I feel sick but what I should know,
Is that I’ll puke in the sink and then piss in my bed.
Track Name: Doughnut Man
Doughnut Man

All they see is the red within,
Always looking beneath the skin,
Can’t see between the sugar and the dough on the surface he is scared,

He’s so scared to trust anyone who comes too near,
Near to the only thing he fears,
Can’t you see it is written in his eyes?

Hey Mr Doughnut Man I hear they’re trying to kill you
So back off man, you better not try it
Don’t worry man ‘cause I’ll kill them with my Kung-Fu!
So back off man you better not try...

I will train you and be your defender,
Bench press a muffin to make you stronger,
They are not going to rest a day so I think you’d best prepare,

Prepare for the fuss and fighting of the year,
Prepare ‘cause they’re coming over here,
Don’t kill me, pick on someone your own size.
Track Name: Meat Party: Episode IV
Meat Party: Episode IV

DERRYCK: I’m so used to standing up with you, So why’d you blindside me now?
LUCIAS: The force is strong, now something went wrong, hence we voice this out loud.
DERRYCK: A decade of you is just technical abuse, enough pretending ‘cause I’m tired of this ruse.
LUCIAS: Done, have fun, no hesitation, to the curb with you, now you’re done and begone.

Kill me now, just kill me now,
‘Cause you’ll never have the chance to,
Just kill me now,
‘Cause you know that you’ll win, so some on and kill me now.

DERRYCK: Being up here next to you makes me sick, it’s been ten years and I still think you’re a prick.
LUCIAS: An age ago I took pity on a ginge, but you’re an asshole and your solos make me cringe.
DERRYCK: Hey man I’m surprised that you’re ripping at me, I thought self deprication was more your scene.
LUCIAS: Hey Derryck won’t you play a top c? Nah, you lost it man, you’re not even a G.

DERRYCK: It’s so bright when I’m coming up to meet ya, it’s nt a solar panel, you’ve just got alopecia.
LUCIAS: Ok I’m bald and I’m not than thin, but I’m a righty and at least I’ve got my skin.
DERRYCK: Ok I’ll admit you’re getting better with the diss, but I’d like to hear you try and sing like this.
LUCIAS: Before you throw that back at me, propagate your vocabulary, propagate it, and augment it.
Track Name: It's Not Me, It's You
It's Not Me, It's You

I’ve got more faults than a refund pile,
I’m a mess, even I don’t look like me.
You might need your money back,
Or a part exchange, but I can’t find the receipt.

Enough of me, how are you, you look good today.
But I didn’t mean to talk about me again.
But it’s better than ‘I love you’ cliches.

I’m sorry bout this, but I thought you knew.
It’s not about me, It’s about you.

Apologies if you’ve heard this before,
Bout my big nose, and my bad teeth.
And don’t be surprised by what’s on top,
Or my lack of fringe, cause I’m a carpet underneath.
Track Name: John Feldmann's Going To Kill Me
John Feldmann’s Going To Kill Me

I want to write some songs,
And I wanna impress my friends,
I need to validate my time,
That I spend travelling,
And putting up with these guys,
I need to make this whole thing right,

But somewhere along the way,
The muse stopped calling me,
And couldn’t reach me on the phone,
And now I’m stuck,
With a reggae progression in E,
That I didn’t even write on my own,

I need to take some time alone,
To come up with an original plan,
Stop idolising Superman...

Mr John Feldmann is gonna be mad,
Cause when he hears what i’ve done,
He’ll put his foot up my ass...
You are my hero don’t take it personally,
Cause if I declare my love well it’s not plagiary.

My friend Carlita called,
To tell me his girlfriend’s shower sucks,
And talk about our stomping ground,
I’ve got 99 good reasons,
Why I didn’t hang up,
And I’m not alone in a crowd.

Now you see the problem,
That’s been haunting me,
I got a discount on this song,
With my 5 gold fingers,
And my no remorse,
We might make it all along.

And I need to take some time alone,
To come up with an original plan,
Stop plagiarising Superman..

And if I wrote the song myself,
Then I wouldn’t have to pay.
Track Name: Suckerpunch

If I think what I wanna think well does that make me a better man?
If I drink what I wanna drink does that make me drinker than I am?

If I do what you want me to does that mean that I am popular?
If I dress how you want me to does that validate you as you are?
The clock is ticking, I expected parity
But if we are still buying albums by The Streets I fail to see…

How we know, half as much, when I can’t remember what it is I had for lunch
I think you know, we talk too much, waiting for that figurative suckerpunch.

If I muse what I wanna think does that mean that I pontificate?
Can I ponder on that thought while I sit down and ruminate?
The clock is ticking I expected clairity
If Da Vinci Code can still outsell Relentless than I fail to see…

If I know what I wanna know does that qualify me for a break?
Can I leave I don’t wanna play if it means decisions that I make…
Are scrutinised, I wanted privacy
But after listening if you don’t think you are dumber help me see...
Track Name: Battle Axe
Battle Axe

When did we give you the space to deceive me
It’s just a giant slap in the face for the needy.
This all could have gone away, it would've have been easy
But now you're going to pay you’d better believe me

We're getting pissed off with all this duplicity
Saying that you'll help and then banking your gratuities
You spent away our trust, you didn't even think that-
Now you're pushing us over the edge and now we're right on the brink of it.

And now it's time for us to act

So I’ll get my battle axe
Where's my legion of warriors at?
Cause we've been screwed by the higher player
And this time we're not falling behind

Yeah I'll get my battle axe
And we're gonna get what we're due back
And it's you who will have to pay up
Cos this time, we're gonna take it back.

Sordid happenings in board rooms, churning the cauldrons.
Concoctions given to the victims inside the courtroom
The poison buries deep inside, but we have tried...
To expose the parts that spread disease by spreading lies.

And what a big surprise the richer get richer
Open up your eyes and you'll see the picture
Cause you spent away our trust, you didn't even think that-
Now you're pushing us over the edge and now we're right on the brink of it.
Track Name: [BONUS TRACK]
If I Had To Do Any Animal

If I had to do any animal,
If you forced me to decide,
It wouldn't matter if we weren't compatible,
Amphibian or reptile.

I wouldn't flinch, or think twice,
I'd dress up like a lioness and make it fun,
If I had to do any animal,
It'd probably be your mum.